Feb 10, 2012

My World!

Being a mommy is the most amazing feeling. I can't imagine feeling a stronger love than this! I love being able to hold her and kiss her sweet little face. I love it when she looks at me and I know she knows who I am. She is the most beautiful person in my eyes. And she looks so much like her wonderful daddy. :) (Thank heaven! lol)
I am SO grateful for this amazing experience because not everyone gets to have it! After I miscarried with my first I felt as though I would never be happy again. I had so much hate and anger inside of me. At everything and everyone. I thought I would never be the same person again, and even though I had a wonderful friend to share my feelings with, it didn't diminish my sadness or anger, it only made it easier to bare. Then, things started to change once I was pregnant again. I was extremely scared that I would lose this baby. I felt as though it was too good to be true. I was excited, but nervously reserved. The first time I heard her heart beating was a little miracle for me. And since that time my anger, sadness, pain, and hate all melted away. I now don't need to make myself happy... clothes, shoes, nails, and hair don't matter to me. She is what matters to me and she is my happiness.
This in no way means that I won't shop or get my hair done and it also doesn't mean that I won't enjoy myself from time to time with worldly things. But my daughter and my husband come first in my life. Their happiness is the most important thing to me now. They ARE my world. They are my everything!
Brailey with her daddy :) the TWO best things to happen in my life.
Such a beautiful girl! :D
So innocent :)
I can't wait to see what the future holds for my little family.

Feb 3, 2012

Best Family!!

I have the BEST family ever! Just saying. They have done so much for me and Jordan and our new little Brailey. I couldn't have asked for a more awesome family.
First, I have the most AMAZING husband who has been so awesome with our little baby. He is one heck of a Daddy and I couldn't have asked for a better companion or best friend in this world then him. He has been so supportive of me and wanting to start a family and now he is doing more for us. He is not only working full time to pay our bills, but he is also going to school full time so that one day we can have even more than we do now. I love him so very much!
Holding our precious little girl. :)
The second greatest help is my mom! She stayed with us for a while to help us out and what a FANTASTIC person she is. She brought up a whole bunch of meals that she made for us each night, plus enough for leftovers so that we wouldn't have to worry about cooking for a while. She also helped us watch our little girl when we needed to sleep or shower or go grocery shopping. My mom was such a great blessing for us for the first week of Braileys life because with being a new mom its hard enough to even think about eating and sleeping let alone to actually DO these things. She was there for us every bit of the way and all she got in return was an uncomfortable couch to sleep on and restless nights and days. She has gone out of her way to help me all of my life and now she has gone above and beyond by helping me with my own daughter. She is by far THE BEST mom out there. Love her!
My mom with Brailey
And last but not least my WONDERFUL sisters came up on Wednesday to visit and brought a whole bunch of frozen meals so that we can just pop them in the oven or in a pot and eat. Such a great blessing! They have been amazing with advice and offering to help whenever they can. They have done more for me now then I could ever do for them in a lifetime. :) These two are just awesome. I sure do love my sisters!
Angie and Brailey at the hospital
Adalyn, Krystal, and Brailey up for a visit. :)

An Angel from Heaven

My little girl was born a week and a half early on a very snowy night. I had just got off work at 9:30pm and headed to Walmart to pick up some milk since we were out... I was walking pretty fast and had a few strong contractions. I, of course, didn't think anything of them because exercise always made me have them. No sooner did I get home and inside the door that I felt a little gush of fluid. I thought maybe I just accidentally peed my pants, but when the gush kept coming I knew that my water broke. This was it! This was the moment I had been waiting for! I was SO afraid that I would have to be induced to get my little girl here at 41 weeks, but she had decided to surprise us and come a bit early. :D
Jordan and I got everything ready frantically and headed to the hospital where I was checked in to room 9 (lucky number) lol. They helped me get ready and checked everything. I was only 1.5 cm dilated and 80% effaced which was no different from my appointments the weeks beforehand. The contractions started pretty soon afterwards and I did my best to hold off on the epidural. They reached peak at 100 and I just kept waiting. Hours passed and I wasn't dilating very much so I asked them to put me on pitocen to speed things up. Once they did my contractions got worse and would stay peaked for long amounts of time. At this point I was dilated to a 3 after 4 hours and finally asked for the epidural. Definitely worth it! Though I hate the feeling of being numb, I preferred this to the pain of the contractions, which as I watched on the monitor showed about up to 5 in a row at 100. I think I would have been screaming my bloody guts out if I had to feel that many, that strong, in a row.
The night passed and the snow stopped, the nurses told me that if I wanted my doctor to deliver the baby then I had to do so before 7 because it would then be my doctors day off. I was so disappointed because I knew I wouldn't make it that soon. After being on the pitocen I was only dilating 1 cm every hour. They finally boosted the dosage on the pitocen and I went from a 5 to a 9 in an hour and a half. An hour later I was fully dilated. They told me that my doctor was making some rounds at the hospital and that she said she would deliver my baby for me. What relief!!! I was SO happy and grateful that she was willing to do this for me since it was already past 7am and it was her day off nonetheless.
This was when they started having me push. For about an hour and 15 minutes I pushed and at 10:35 am on a beautiful sunny, snow covered day I had my gorgeous baby girl Brailey Ann Pitchford. :) 6 pounds 9 ounces and 18.5 inches long. She is everything I have ever dreamed of and more! She is perfection in every way. And I couldn't have prayed for a better turnout of labor. Only 12 hours in labor and every minute of it was worth it. :D
I love this little Angel more than anything and I can't believe that time is moving so quickly on us already.
Me holding my little girl. :) And yes I look like a mess, but so would you after 12 hours of labor, nothing to eat for over 24 hours, and pushing for an hour and 15 minutes. lol. And I would do it all again in a heartbeat for her.
Such a darling all dressed up... even with her "kicks" (shoes) lol
Eyes wide open at the hospital. She looks SO much like her daddy. :D
Going home outfit. Daddy just had to pick out a dress lol.
This day was one of the best days of my life because I got to bring my little Brailey into this world! I love her SO very much that I can't even begin to describe just how strong a love it is. I want to give her everything. Heavenly Father sent me this wonderful angel and I couldn't be more grateful that He did. Life just wouldn't be the same without her.